Or at least that's what I'd have to believe.
I feel that sometimes, if I let on to people if me and Chase are having problems [even the tiniest ones] like our relationship is shit in their eyes. And I know, when it comes down to it, their opinion does not matter one bit, but I don't want people to think that.
In the scheme of things our relationship is pretty damn perfect.
We don't argue.
We love each other completely
He buys me presents just because
I buy him things that remind me of him
He calls just to hear my voice
We talk on webcam when we can't be together
And when we are together everythings incredible
Our relationship is about love and about fun.
But then something happens
And it doesn't change anything, at least not normally for him.
Recently, I've been finding places to live for the next year - halls of residence are only there for first years.
And I said to Chase about me and him living together because it'll be awesome. Waking up next to him every day and going to sleep next to him every night, cooking him dinner and coming home to him every day sounds like my idea of bliss.
Plus, I'd much rather live with him [my boyfriend of 18 months] than some people that, although I do like, I have only known for 3 months.
Chase chose the latter. He would rather live with one of my housemates who he's really close to, than me.
Yeah.
Now he says this is because he doesn't want anything to change between us. That if we live together we could break up and he's happy with the way things are.
But all I hear is 'Chances are we'll break up before next September anyway/I'm not that happy with you anymore/I don't want to live with you.'
I mean, why else would he want to live with someone he's only known for a few months over me?
When people ask me about it 'Oh, are you not going to be living with Chase next year?' I just say what he said to me, not believing it myself, 'We like things the way they are. A lot could change if we lived together.'
As well, it seems like everybody is moving forward. Girlfriends and boyfriends are moving in together, my step-brother just got ENGAGED to his girlfriend of 8/9 months...
I'm not looking for engagement, definitely not, but I'm fed up of this.
One of my flatmates is moving in with her boyfriend and I asked her if she thought that was a good idea, what if they broke up? What if things changed? And she said;
"Maybe. But then maybe not. I'd rather have 2, 3, 4 months of living together really, really happily than this. I mean, if you love each other enough to live together, you love each other enough to work through all your problems. There's no point in a relationship if you don't love each other enough to work through your problems.'
I don't think Chase loves me enough sometimes.
Leigh, i don't think its a case of him not loving you enough. Maybe he really does just want to keep things the way they are and would rather only see you now and again so he can keep you for another few years than risk it.
ReplyDeleteI know it seems that because he doesn't want to move in with you he just doesn't care like you do but maybe that isn't it. There are a lot of people moving in together thinking they are ready and then their once perfect and happy relationship goes to shit.
Remember the most simplest answer isn't always the right one.
just try not to worry too much ok? (:
As I showed in my friends response though - she and her boyfriend [who havent even been together for a year yet] have said that they want to move in because IF anything happens they love each other enough to sort it out. It shows a big flaw if that's not his thought process.
ReplyDeletePlus, he has lived with me before for a short time so he knows what it's like to live with me so all this 'I dont want things to change' bullshit is obviously that. Bullshit.
And I'm not worried. I just don't believe the reasons for it that he gives me.